Joel's Blog
Consent – What is Justice
A year on from my second sexual violent assault, robbery and destruction of my flat. I am still questioning, what is justice? What would I want that to look like? The police not only did not act in my best interest, but I still feel they treated my case differently as they saw and assumed a different set of rules.
Welcome to 2020 – Stop Apologising for Being You!
If I choose to make my New Year Resolutions, I try to always make them towards the end of January. My New Year Resolution is that I’m going to stop apologising for being me and stop hiding my true self. I did a lot of reading around gender, trans and non-binary identities at the end of 2019.
Consent and Forgiveness
In the last four months, since my perpetrator sexually assaulted me, I have felt every feeling attached to the cycle of loss: denial, numbness, sadness, anger and acceptance. I believe I lost who I was in those moments that he violated my consent and my sense of innocence around sex.
LGBTQIA+ Too Consent Now
Is it time that our LGBTQ+ community has a conversation about consent? As LGBTQ+ folk we have often been policed for our sexual behaviour or how we express ourselves sexually. As a former member of the kink community myself. I was fearful of going to the police to gain support.
ManSize Tissues
This blog is not what you think it will be about. Each week in the room I use on a Wednesday evening, to see my Gender Queer, Non-Binary and Transgender clients, there sits a box of Man Size Tissues. These are on the table between us.
World AIDS Day 1st December 2018: Dearest Mark
My first boyfriend Mark died rom HIV when I was just 18 years old. I have come to the realisation that Mark is still alive in me. The love and compassion I have for him is still alive today. He is the person who helps me find the drive for my work in the HIV community today.
My Gender Queer Journey
Somewhere on my journey of finding myself I discovered my Gender Queer Identity. Gender Queer means a person like me, who does not subscribe to conventional gender distinctions but identifies with neither, both, or a combination of male and female genders.
Re-Writing My Story: From Darkness to Light
“The work that one does is a way of keeping a diary” Pablo Picasso This blog will reflect a bit on the early days and how this has informed my work. This is my last day of paid work in the Sexual Health and HIV sector. As you may have seen from my...
The Story I Must Stop Telling
When you think about home what do you think about? What important qualities does your home need to have to feel at home in it? Who would you invite into your home?
Living with Chronic Pain
I am going to start this blog by sharing my own experience of living with chronic pain and neurological problems. I will then talk about some strategies that I have put in place over the last twelve years that have helped both me and those that care about me know what to do when I’m having a bad flare up
Sober Sex
I apologise this is one of my longer blogs as I felt I wanted to do the subject justice. Recently, I went to see the ChemSex Documentory as part of the BFI A hard-hitting and often graphic documentary about the ChemSex sub-scene in London’s gay community.
Consent – What is Justice
A year on from my second sexual violent assault, robbery and destruction of my flat. I am still questioning, what is justice? What would I want that to look like? The police not only did not act in my best interest, but I still feel they treated my case differently as they saw and assumed a different set of rules.
Welcome to 2020 – Stop Apologising for Being You!
If I choose to make my New Year Resolutions, I try to always make them towards the end of January. My New Year Resolution is that I’m going to stop apologising for being me and stop hiding my true self. I did a lot of reading around gender, trans and non-binary identities at the end of 2019.
Consent and Forgiveness
In the last four months, since my perpetrator sexually assaulted me, I have felt every feeling attached to the cycle of loss: denial, numbness, sadness, anger and acceptance. I believe I lost who I was in those moments that he violated my consent and my sense of innocence around sex.
LGBTQIA+ Too Consent Now
Is it time that our LGBTQ+ community has a conversation about consent? As LGBTQ+ folk we have often been policed for our sexual behaviour or how we express ourselves sexually. As a former member of the kink community myself. I was fearful of going to the police to gain support.
ManSize Tissues
This blog is not what you think it will be about. Each week in the room I use on a Wednesday evening, to see my Gender Queer, Non-Binary and Transgender clients, there sits a box of Man Size Tissues. These are on the table between us.
World AIDS Day 1st December 2018: Dearest Mark
My first boyfriend Mark died rom HIV when I was just 18 years old. I have come to the realisation that Mark is still alive in me. The love and compassion I have for him is still alive today. He is the person who helps me find the drive for my work in the HIV community today.
My Gender Queer Journey
Somewhere on my journey of finding myself I discovered my Gender Queer Identity. Gender Queer means a person like me, who does not subscribe to conventional gender distinctions but identifies with neither, both, or a combination of male and female genders.
Re-Writing My Story: From Darkness to Light
“The work that one does is a way of keeping a diary” Pablo Picasso This blog will reflect a bit on the early days and how this has informed my work. This is my last day of paid work in the Sexual Health and HIV sector. As you may have seen from my...
The Story I Must Stop Telling
When you think about home what do you think about? What important qualities does your home need to have to feel at home in it? Who would you invite into your home?
Living with Chronic Pain
I am going to start this blog by sharing my own experience of living with chronic pain and neurological problems. I will then talk about some strategies that I have put in place over the last twelve years that have helped both me and those that care about me know what to do when I’m having a bad flare up
Sober Sex
I apologise this is one of my longer blogs as I felt I wanted to do the subject justice. Recently, I went to see the ChemSex Documentory as part of the BFI A hard-hitting and often graphic documentary about the ChemSex sub-scene in London’s gay community.